Another kindness, hopefully repaid

So, yesterday I had an email from Liz de Jager, someone I’ve corresponded with for a few years but only met a few times. The email contained useful information of the kind that can assist those of the car-accident-career persuasion; people like me, for example.

I have nothing but my words to give in return. So here they are, Liz – a bit pants but what can you do?

The Understuff

Browne and Woolley were a pair

Of partners making underwear;

Their undergarments duly famed

As haute couture were aptly named.

They made vests to snugly fit

The genius or utter twit.

They made them too to tightly wrap

The chubby lass or skinny chap.

But work it out I cannot fully

Why they made them brown and woolly.

They made tights to cling to legs

The size of trees or wooden pegs.

Their tights would stay up very well

In turbulence or ten foot swell.

They made knickers of all kinds

To line all manner of behinds.

Knickers that could bare that brunt

And in the bargain, cover fronts.

But understand I cannot fully

A gusset that is brown and woolly.

The corsets they were famous for

Could well contain a civil war.

And such a garment, tightly laced

Would narrow down the widest waist.

Of bras that came in just one colour,

We used to think, “What could be duller?”

Now they are a fashion must

That hold up any size of bust.

But comfortable I am not fully

In sub-apparel brown and woolly

Be you large or be you small,

Be you short or be you tall,

Do not let your wardrobe lack

A Browne and Woolley starter pack.

In it you are sure to find

The nethertogs to blow your mind.

No more chills and no more sagging

With Browne and Woolley underlagging.

But comprehend I cannot fully

Those underpanters Browne and Woolley.


A post about teaching novel writing and how conflicted I am on the subject will follow soon…


2 thoughts on “Another kindness, hopefully repaid

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