The Clown Wars launch: tips and guidelines for a safe event

Well, folks, it’s time for Jeremy and I to launch the print version of Clown Wars: Blood & Aspic!

We’re going to do that very thing on the evening of November 17th at the Big Green Bookshop – further event details will follow closer to the time.

Meanwhile, current events being what they are clownwise, we’ve had to adjust our plans for the evening somewhat and we’re asking for a little cooperation from those of you planning to attend.

  • Please do not dress up as a clown – clowns will be refused entry to the event
  • A bag search will be in operation on the door to prevent clown ‘paraphernalia’ being brought in
  • Real clowns are welcome but must be dressed like humans
  • Red noses – real or detachable – will not be permitted inside the building
  • Any inappropriate remarks or jokes concerning clown security may result in your arrest
  • Do show your support for recently unemployed clowns by leaving donations in the Hobo charity box
  • Custard pies will be served throughout the evening, however the police have insisted we remove the custard for security reasons
  • Spoken passages from Clown Wars: Blood & Aspic have been ‘modified’ to remove all reference to clowns, clown activities and anything that might be construed as silly, farcical or humorous
  • Nevertheless, trigger warnings will be issued on the night to prevent audience discomfort during the author readings
  • Whilst the organisers appreciate that book launches are intended to be fun, we ask that attendees stick to sensible topics when in conversation with each other, the shop owners or the authors
  • For safety reasons, we ask that levity of any kind be avoided. Attendees ignoring this stipulation will be asked to leave

Most importantly, we hope you’ll have an entertaining, enriching and completely clown-free evening.

We look forward to seeing you there – it’s going to be a great night!sad-clown

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