Today it’s nothing to do with me. Really.
Apart from the fact that I know some of these clowns personally…
I have two events coming up in November, both in honour of new books. Drop in and say hi if you’re free…
Clown Wars book launch
My friends Simon and Tim at the Big Green Bookshop have made the foolish schoolboy error of allowing Jeremy Drysdale and I to have a secret clown party on their premises. Except it’s not a secret and no clowns are allowed – see below.
Making of that what you will, do join us for tea, sandwiches and custard pies on the evening of 17th November from 7pm onwards. We will read a passage or two from the book, discuss your concerns about the current spate of clown profiling and mingle a bit too.
Signed copies, as you’d expect, but stocks of the physical books are limited.
The Veil book launch
A few days later, on 26th Nov, I’ll be at Sledgelit in Derby with the owner/editor of Horrific Tales Publishing, Graeme Reynolds. We’ll be launching the limited edition hardback of The Veil (ebook and audio versions also available).
There’ll be lots of other cool stuff going on at Sledgelit and many of your favourite genre authors will be there too. Come and see us!
There’s so much more to tell you about this book but in terms of cover art, it’s a case of…well, judge for yourself… Continue reading
Well, folks, it’s time for Jeremy and I to launch the print version of Clown Wars: Blood & Aspic!
We’re going to do that very thing on the evening of November 17th at the Big Green Bookshop – further event details will follow closer to the time.
Meanwhile, current events being what they are clownwise, we’ve had to adjust our plans for the evening somewhat and we’re asking for a little cooperation from those of you planning to attend.
Most importantly, we hope you’ll have an entertaining, enriching and completely clown-free evening.
We look forward to seeing you there – it’s going to be a great night!
In the light of recent events concerning incidents of stalking, threats of assault, harassment, breach of the peace and other nuisance-making – all allegedly perpetrated by people dressed as clowns – the authors of Clown Wars: Blood & Aspic wish to make the following statement:
“We do not condone, nor have we ever, clown impersonators and/or clown-associated accoutrements, disguises or paraphernalia for the purpose of causing intimidation, harm or unrest. Nor do we find the global spate of such ‘attacks’ in any way amusing.
Clown Wars: Blood & Aspic is a work of pure fiction written, like any other novel, as entertainment. It was never intended to inspire idiots to dress up as clowns and run around terrifying innocent people.
We now feel it is time to distance ourselves from any and all such activities by saying loud and clear: this has nothing whatsoever to do with us.
This is our final comment on the matter and we do not wish to hear from reporters – or members of the public pretending to be ‘real’ clowns. Nor will we field any further complaints about the contents of the book. None of this is our responsibility. It’s just a story.”
Joseph D’Lacey and Jeremy Drysdale
Oct 10th, 2016
NB: All comments will be strictly moderated.
I’m delighted to see this novel make it into print after such a long time. We wouldn’t have planned it this way but steep learning curves aren’t such a bad thing. Besides, getting everything wrong is a defining clown trait and we’re proud to posses it in spades.
What underpins this post, though, on the day that Clown Wars finally becomes a real book, is a feeling of gratitude to my co-author, Jeremy Drysdale. This whole nonsensical shebang was his idea. More ridiculous still, I actually agreed to help him turn it from a spec script treatment into a novel.
This resulted in a cascade of preposterous absurdities, all of which revolved around one central irony:
Commissioning editors loved it but not one of them had any idea who the readership might be or how to market such a galactic genre anomaly. We came tantalisingly close to that ‘traditional’ publishing route several times, yet the final answer was always no.
Not everyone loved the book, of course. A few had a fear of clowns and couldn’t stand it. Frustratingly, they were all industry gatekeepers – among them, the producer at Aardman who first saw the idea and politely told Jeremy to get lost. A few agents and editors had similar feelings.
We had to accept the facts: if we didn’t publish it ourselves, the readership would remain steady at zero and all marketing would remain hypothetical, a realisation that took five years to sink in (clowns don’t take hints too well, either).
I know I speak for Jeremy when I say that believing in a book this…leftfield…has been trying, especially after so many extremely positive knockbacks. But that’s another thing about clowns; every time you knock ’em down, they bounce back up again. Kinda creepy, actually.
So, back to that feeling of gratitude:
Jeremy Drysdale brought me this curiosity. We’ve had no end of fun and heartache developing it but a worthwhile existence is full of fun and heartache, I think – it lets you know you’ve lived. Bringing Clown Wars into the world has informed us, loud and clear, that we’re very much not quite dead yet.
If you feel any of the same kind of gratitude after reading the book, you can help us.
Tell someone about the book. Tell your therapist; you never know. If you can’t think what to get for a weird relative this Christmas, buy them a copy of Clown Wars – it’s a steal at £7.99 and guaranteed to be unique. Get on Amazon and leave us a rating and review – it really does make a difference – and do something similar on Goodreads and Librarything or your blog.
And here’s why we need your help:
We have no marketing budget. We have no publicist. We’ll never have a poster campaign or be in a well-known book club. We won’t be reviewed in papers or magazines. There’s only you, our readers, and what you say about the book. So, if you love it, we hope you’ll share that love.